Sailing & Boating Advice

Sailboats sit in a harbor

It is of paramount importance that you have some idea of where you want to go and how many other brave souls you want to take with you before you choose your “Dream Boat”.   Sailing off to paradise with 5 people in a 3 bunk boat can make for some interesting (not always bad)  bunk mate matches.  However,  a limited number of  bunks can keep the  crew count realistic.  A small sailing or power boat will be good start.  Let’s say something in the 21 to 27 foot range.  There are so many inexpensive boats in this range that I can only say one thing.  If after you look at a hundred boats, you have book marked 10 that could suit your needs.  Re contact the owners or brokers and offer 1/2 the asking price. You will get some pretty interesting reactions, but my guess if any of these boats have been for sale for a while, you may get some surprising counter offers, and quite possibly an acceptance or two.  I have made some amazing purchases of cars and boats by making some stupid offers.

If you buy right, you can sell right.  Remember, as much as you think you are buying your forever boat…..you are not. The most important part of  boating is to use each sailing or power boat as a stepping stone leading to the perfect choice.  A good choice in sailing or power craft will be the least expensive one that will take you where you want to go.  “I/we want to sail around the world!”  Is a noble dream, but unless you have ignored recently published stories about pirates in every corner of the world that will kill you for no good reason,  you best settle on a more regional adventure.

I plan to sail the Mediterranean on my ultimate last boat.  A 36+ foot aluminum catamaran (Which I will build cheaply)  But I plan to first cruise locally (Southern California) then Mexico (Sea of Cortez) dis assemble the boat, trailer the three pieces to Florida  re assemble the boat, make a bee line for the civilized areas in the Carribbean and during the non hurricane season.  I will put the boat “on the hard” when the hurricane season comes and party with the natives till sailing weather comes around again.   Tropical storm season being. June is too soon but by october it’s all over. (U.S. and British Virgin Islands/St Croix/St Kits/ St. Barts then back to Miami where I may ship the boat in three containers or choose my weather and chance the Atlantic and on to the Med and the birthplace of civilization where I will make movies and paint and just be an old man and live out my days chasing young women and enjoying my villa overlooking the sea which I will build with the money I will get from the sale of my catamaran.

I WANT TO LIVE TO A HUNDRED AND THREE YEARS OLD AND THE LAST THING I WANT ANYBODY TO HEAR ME SAY IS ..WATCH THIS! As I drink ouzo and dance to the music of ” Zorba The Greek”!

When you own “that boat” you will know it.  She will be your soul mate. You will carry her picture in your wallet.  You will buy her gifts and will want to be with her 24 hours a day.  You will take her to places she has never been before.  You will caress her private parts and her name will be in your thoughts and dreams sleeping or awake.   She will demand nothing from you but you will sense her every need and address it. Your wife will hate her and ultimately you will be told “It’s me or the F——- boat!   Make a choice! The moment you have dreaded would come…or wished for.

I suppose that makes me the worst kind of chauvanist, but as a 70 year old bachelor with two sailboats, no wife and a long history repleat with dozens of car/boat/race car/woman experiences, I find there was at least some  value to the first three categories, but once a woman turns on you or develops some sort of problem you can’t solve or deal with  I have never been able to sell them to the next fool.  They have no trade in value and usually it costs a lot to junk them. 

Ladies,  if you buy a boat and spend significant time and resources on it,  you will find many of the same circumstances will prevail and cause the same reaction by your significant other. Don’t blame me I didn’t write the book, I have just  read it…… a few times!

If you just want to “go sailing or boating”  A lido 14,   Hobi Cat, Sabot  or runabout will get you out on the pond, lake or bay.  A few hundred dollars and a glance through  Craigs list or e bay, or the local classifieds will get you set up with some sort of day sailer or a small fishing skiff.  I don’t have much advice for you if that is the extent of your nautical dream.  It is, however a great way to start the stepping stone approach to your eventual globe girdling mega-yacht.

Oh, I see, you just want to buy a boat and  take right off  to the nearest place where you can anchor and spend a few days “On the hook.”  Then let me suggest that you will need to determine the minimum accomodations that are acceptable to you and your crew.

In my opinion, going ashore from the anchorage in the inflatable boat which you have chosen as your tender (shoreboat) to look for a place to dine and drink and maybe sleep (hotel or camp ground) is as much a part of the ideal cruising adventure as tending to the care and maintenance of the systems that will allow you to do everything  “on your boat”.

AS I THINK OF IT, MAYBE YOUR FIRST VESSEL SHOULD BE THE DINGHY YOU WILL NEED FOR YOUR  MINI, MIDI, OR MAXI YACHT!  However, if after a couple of bouncy inflatable rides or after trying to haul more than two people in a hard “dink”,  especially through even the smallest waves and surf  you decide you don’t want salt spray in your face and wet buttocks for the weekend you can head for an anchorage that has bouys (cans) they rent by the day and there is usually a shore boat which will be by to take you and your mob to shore.  A few bucks each way and you will be chauffer drivin to the local accomodations.   Be sure to find out when the last boat leaves the dock and appoint a designated time keeper.  If you are a single hander (solo sailor) you will only miss the last boat a couple of times before you start to appreciate having your own dinghy.

I now always tow a dinghy behind my boat.  There have been times when that little tender, lashed alongside,like a tug, has brought the mother-ship home in the middle of the night after a days’ sail off- shore and an auxilliary engine that decided to not start, or quit unexpectedly.  Of course that only happens on those beautiful  days when the wind quits early.

I don’t know you, so I can’t really tell you what kind of craft will best serve your needs.  I can say however, the less bells/whistles, do dads/flippers and gizmos it has, the fewer things will break down when you are using and depending on them.  Some of the happiest cruisers I ever met were sail in very small boats,  crapping in a bucket and showering with the same (washed out of course) bucket and here’s the part I wonder about.  Where did they wash their dishes?  Now I don’t suggest that you go that far off the grid, but there is something to minimizing the systems on a boat.

Coming home to all the creature comforts of a house is a wonderful reward after a sea borne camping trip.  Please don’t try to take suburban living to sea with you….It does not work.